Wednesday, 3 April 2013


It's the Easter holidays, which for me started a week early after I hurt my back at school.  I'm loving the break from work, the long lay-ins, the freedom to come and go as I wish, but must confess to feeling a little bit lonely at times.

My daughter is working a lot during the holidays, which is absolutely brilliant.  It stops her getting bored, puts some money in her pocket and above all, keeps her and Milo from arguing constantly.... but I am missing her a bit.  Milo has bought himself a pre-owned X-Box - something I've always been adamant I would never let him have, fearing he would turn into a zombie child, or worse, it would make his tics even more violent.  I have to say, that generally, it feels like a heaven-sent gift.  He is occupied and happy, happy, happy to be able to connect with his friends without having to wait for them to be allowed out.  He does get a bit overexcited when he plays some of the games, and then we have some major tic sessions, but overall, particularly when he is hooked up to the microphone, he is much calmer.  I was dreading these holidays, if I'm honest, but so far, they have been quite wonderful. 

On the downside, I am craving some adult contact and conversation, and finding that my oomph is starting to wane a bit with regards to Getting My Life Sorted.  The fact that it is still so bitterly cold here, snowing again tonight, means that the new smoothie diet is taking a while to catch hold - I've shivered my way through them for four mornings (not consecutive), but my perfectionist self has been thrown by 'life' getting in the way again.  One morning I had an early osteopath appointment in the next town, so shunned the smoothie as I didn't want to be desperate for the loo while he was manipulating my back!  Today, my ex hubby decided he didn't want to drop Milo off to me, so I got a last minute text from him asking me to collect from his  He does that, my ex, still likes to control my life, despite the fact we have been divorced for ten years.

Anyway.  The point is, that I could have made healthier choices...made the smoothie for lunch or a late breakfast on those days, instead of reaching for the cocopops and tea...but I didn't.  The healthy choices haven't yet become a habit, but I'm not beating myself up about it.  Friday is shopping day, and I have a childfree weekend where I can kick start my motivation again.  It is the holidays after all, and there is no routine and it's far too flipping cold to do anything except huddle indoors or cosy up in a coffee shop.

I picked up a magazine in Sainsburys yesterday.  There was a double page spread featuring my dream house.  I haven't written a blog post about my dream house yet....I think about it all the time, and obviously it changes as I come across things that I love etc.  This house I saw yesterday though is as close as I've ever found.  There is the small matter of the price - £875,000 - but apparently the Universe doesn't worry about limiting details like that, so I bought a lottery ticket tonight and have been planning my vegetable garden.... 

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