Sunday, 24 February 2013

Planning to fly

All our dreams can come true - if we have the courage to pursue them.     (Walt Disney)

I'm posting a lot this weekend, and writing screeds.  It comes from having thought a lot about this for several weeks and then having a week off work and now a childfree weekend.  I am meant to be cleaning the house after a week of neglecting it, but hey.  I wanted to get to a starting point from which to begin - to recognise what holds me back and to identify my dreams.  From there, I can take baby steps, day by day, always focussing, always holding my vision clear.


Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.   (Goethe)

I want to put some photos in and add some stuff down the sides of this blog aswell.  How difficult can that be to figure out?  Hmm.


Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.  Live the life you have imagined.     (Henry Thoreau)

A well-used quote but how many of us actually pursue our dreams confidently?  How often do we get swept away in the tide of life for years and years until we lose sight of all that we wanted to be?  How many of us have a real, definite idea of what we want, and a real, definite plan of how to achieve it?  How many of us are just settling, conforming to a mainstream life of uninspiring jobs, hectic schedules, once a year (maybe) holidays, shoddy diets, sporadic exercise, snatched moments of quality family time.....tired, stressed, burnt-out, disillusioned, passionless, trying to fit into normal, societal expectations.

I don't want to be normal.

I've never really fitted in anywhere to be honest, never had that sense of belonging, always felt like an outsider looking in.  It stems from those early days I guess - of being from a single parent family when it wasn't really that common...of wearing last year's shabby hand -me- downs when everyone in my class had the latest fashions and seemingly endless money to spend on clothes, make-up and perfume...of not really having that safe place at home where it was ok to make mistakes, to try things out, find my niche.  I was just always a little bit weird, a little non-conformist, a risk-taker, a big dreamer.

Well, I am a little bit weird, and I'm ok with that.  I'm not bothered about fitting in any more.  What matters to me are the people who have stood by me for years, through thick and thin, and giving my children a solid, loving foundation upon which to build their own dreams.  I've had so much loss and been crushed to pieces by people who have expected me to conform to their ideals.   I'm taking a year to re-discover the person that I am inside, weirdness and all, and pursue my dreams.  I'm ready to fly.

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